Tending to your mental health is a recipe that is completely unique to you. Each person needs to find the elements of maintaining homeostasis that works for them. For some, this may be routine & self-care, for others it may be spending time with others & being spontaneous.
While everyone’s mental health routine may be individualized, there’s a few elements we can point to that will take a toll on everyone's mental health. The thing about these qualities is that you may not be aware of the impact they’re having on you, as they’ve been so normalized either in society or in our routine. It can feel hard to shake well-worn habits that may have served a purpose at some point, but are now having an eroding effect on the way we conduct our lives.
Mental health disorders require specific maintenance for symptom management. But even if you’ve never been diagnosed, the small choices you make each day add up and can have a rippling impact on our mental health as a whole.
When it comes to physical health, we’re all aware of the impact bad habits can have. But have you been paying attention to the subtle ways certain habits affect your mental health? Read on to get insight on how these 7 habits can have a negative impact on your mental health.
Perfectionism
Striving for excellence is an admirable trait, and often a boon to our success. But what happens when we take it too far? For most people, that means stewing in our mistakes, and not integrating failure in a helpful way.
Failure is critical to mastery. If we don’t allow ourselves to take stock when we make mistakes, we can never learn. Release the idea that you have to be good at everything. Your weaknesses in some areas is what makes you shine in your strengths. More than that, the expectations of perfectionism are unrealistic and a minefield for negative thinking. Well-adjusted people know how to turn their failures into deep experiences of change.
Shame
Ah, shame. The twisted cousin of guilt, eroding us from the inside. Shame is the pervasive voice that tells us we aren’t good enough, will never be good enough, and offers harsh appraisal of our actions.
How is shame a habit? When we indulge ourselves in the narratives shame lays out for us, we use it as a motivator. Let me tell you now - shame is not an effective motivator. Its ever present voice may serve as a catalyst for more action, but what’s left is the feeling of never being satisfied and never being enough. If we get in the habit of using negative mindsets as a motivator, we will always be left feeling empty.
Lack of Movement
Truth be told, I hate the word exercise. It conjures up an expectation I don’t wish to put on anyone. But movement is something I can get behind. Staying stagnant on the couch, in our homes, or at our places of work has a negative impact on our mental health.
I chose the word movement because it means exactly what it says, move your body. No routine or gym membership needed. You need to find what works for you. This can look like a walk around the block, going dancing with your friends, or gentle yoga. Moving your body regularly increases endorphins, connects you to yourself, and provides a welcome distraction in the face of mental health symptoms.
Overuse of Technology
The studies are in: overuse of technology, especially social media, promotes anxiety and lowers self-esteem. How much time are you spending on your phone? Do you feel the nagging voice telling you to take a picture each time you are out and about? I challenge you to integrate breaks into your social media routine.
Don’t get me wrong, the internet - when used in moderation - can be a great unifier, allowing you to make connections with like-minded people, learn new things, and develop interests. But when used in excess has a high likelihood of increasing depression, jealousy, and comparison. Be mindful of how technology can affect your feelings of self-identity.
Lack of Identity / Codependency
Speaking of self-identity, how well do you know yourself outside of your relationships with others? If you find yourself struggling to spend time alone, this can be a red flag for negative mental health consequences. This is not a knock on my extroverted readers, but rather a good chance to take stock on who you are as a person.
Pay attention to how your moods may be dependent on the moods of others around you, this can be a good warning sign for codependent traits. More than that, what are you goals, hobbies, and attributes that make you who you are?
Poor Boundaries
Showing up for others, especially the people you love, is a trait most people pride themselves on, but there’s a limit to how much we can extend. Do you find yourself saying yes, when you want to say no? This is a red flag for poor boundaries, and is definitely impacting your mental health.
My favorite phrase on this topic is, “it’s a ‘hell yes’ or it’s a ‘no thanks’.” Dig deep into what brings you joy, and start using “no” as a complete sentence.
Focusing on the Negative
Challenge those thoughts! If we go back to perfectionism, the inability to integrate critical thinking skills into our failure will keep us stuck. How acquainted are you with the negative thoughts in your head? Are you able to spot them, or have they become so automatic they’ve started to feel second nature?
Normalizing the negative in every situation as the primary focus will start to shift your perspective for the worst. Allow yourself the integration of negative thoughts, while coupling them with your plans for the future and self-compassion.
Chances are if you’re invested in your mental health, you’ve established routines and habits that have enhanced your ability to engage in the world. But have you paid attention to lingering habits that may be working against you? Use this list as a guide to root out your blind spots, and start making changes today.
As always, rooting for you.
Alexa Cordry, LSW, LCADC
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